The Power of Telling Stories

The Healing Power of Story: Unpacking Our Implicit Selves

The power of narrative to heal and integrate our experiences, both past and present, is profoundly illustrated in Daniel Siegel's work. Consider the powerful account of David and his son, Eli. Eli had developed an inexplicable aversion to cutting tools after his friend, Ryan, accidentally cut himself with Eli's knife.

This single, traumatic event had created a visceral fear in Eli, an implicit memory of raw sensations, fear, and perhaps guilt, stored unconsciously. Eli didn't consciously recall the incident, but his body and mind reacted intensely to the mere presence of knives.

Telling the Story to Tame the Storm

David, rather than dismissing Eli's fear, understood the necessity of transforming this unintegrated implicit memory into a coherent, explicit memory. He patiently encouraged Eli to narrate the story of what happened with Ryan.

Left Brain, Meet Right: The Path to Integration

This wasn't a quick fix; it was a repeated process over time. Each retelling, each time Eli put words to the fragmented images, feelings, and sensations, he engaged his brain’s left hemisphere, which is responsible for logic and language.

This verbalization allowed his young mind to sequence the events, attach meaning to the overwhelming emotions, and ultimately integrate the traumatic experience. The fear didn't vanish entirely, but it became manageable because it was understood, processed, and placed in its proper context as a past event, rather than an omnipresent threat.

This exemplifies how verbal communication is vital in converting implicit memories into explicit ones, fostering emotional healing and mastery.

Grown Bodies, Child Wounds

It strikes me how the principles in this book, written for 0 to 12-year-olds, align so perfectly with situations in my own adult life that require addressing in a similar fashion.

We have all seen it in movies and series – a person with a troubled past or present sprawled on a psychologist's couch airing out all their problems. Or the client believing they don't have any psychological problems like others, and having to be coaxed into saying very little.

The Silence of Men and the Strength to Speak

As adults, and more so men, we tend to think we don't need to talk about our negative experiences. We view it as a badge of honour to crumple up our bad experiences like a piece of paper and toss them into the recesses of our minds. And why? Because “we are men”. Because “we are strong and we take it on the chin”.

The mental struggles that stem from the trauma we experience as adults are strikingly similar to those we have as kids. And when we choose to ignore or compartmentalize these issues, the only thing we'll achieve is stuffing them away in a dark and dingy corner in our minds where they will fester and rot but not go away.

Instead, they become malignant. If the conversations stimulated by the concepts in The Whole-Brain Child also fit like a glove with adults, then it should deeply concern us at the kind of psychological battles our children will be fighting throughout their lives if we neglect them.

Micro-Traumas, Major Weight

And it's not only the significantly traumatic experiences that trouble us, like sexual or physical abuse, or abandonment or rejection by loved ones. It is often the 'smaller' things like being verbally insulted on the street by a stranger whom you will never see again.

Or the teller at the bank being rude to you. We generally do not want to admit that those seemingly innocuous incidents trouble us, because, as we said earlier, that would be a sign of weakness.

Why We Cling to the Negative

The question I often ask myself is why we stew over negativity more than the positive. The truth is the positive or mundane everyday occurrences, which wouldn't dent our egos or feelings, are much more prevalent.

If it were the reverse, we'd most certainly feel like hanging ourselves or lashing out in some way. So why do events that happen once every couple of weeks or months take centre stage in our psyche?

This is not to downplay the severity or extent of people's trauma, though. There are millions of people who have gone through horrific experiences, and many still do. What we should take from the principle of The Power of Talking is that trauma needs to be hung out to dry.

Shaping Future Narratives: The Manasa Project

Meet Manasa—a relatable young protagonist in children’s books and animations. Living in a modest, loving Christian family, his adventures mirror real childhood challenges: friendships, emotions, and moral growth. His father, a church elder, enriches themes of faith and community.

Beyond books, we’re creating social media animations and AI-powered interactive games to help kids practice social-emotional skills from stories like The Whole-Brain Child. Through play and storytelling, Manasa’s world teaches resilience, empathy, and connection.

Call To Action

This marks the 4th and final installment in our deep dive into The Whole-Brain Child. We hope this series has opened your eyes to the lifelong power of emotional integration and storytelling.

Next week, we begin exploring Grit by Angela Duckworth—an essential look at perseverance, passion, and what truly drives long-term success in both children and adults.

But first, don’t miss tomorrow’s issue. Fridays are reserved for our weekly Artificial Intelligence feature, and we’ll be talking about something every parent needs to know: What AI is and why it matters.